Testimony: [noun] evidence given by a wittness.

God has been so amazing to me, and He is calling me to tell my story. So here it is; my testimony.

 Looking back I can see God's fingerprints all over my life, especially at a time when I was incredibly unstable. But at that time I didn't see Him at all. I didn't know what I wanted my life to look like, and I didn't know why I didn't know. I was unhappy and confused. Thankfully God protected me and shielded me from evil, even at a point when I wasn't looking to Him for guidance, certainly not protection. But God knew exactly what I needed when I had no idea. He was so gentle with me I didn't really realize He was there; I just knew that something in me was changing. Then I started to develop a thirst for something. It was so powerful, and I finally knew what I wanted, I finally knew what I believed my life could be like and even though I wasn't 100 % sure that it could really happen I wanted this so badly: that God would come into my life and rule in it.

 Maybe that sounds simple. Believe me, it did not seem at all simple to me! But I wanted it so desperately that I begged Him for it; I told Him that I knew there would be hardships and trials, but if He was willing to lead me, I desired more than anything else to follow.

 That part was neat, I have to admit, but none of it would have mattered if it had stopped there. First came the tough part, I'll call it "getting used to Christian life". Haha, I'll just say, there were a lot of tears involved :). I still didn't really understand what was happening to me, or why that earnest desperate prayer didn't instantly change me or really make my life more enjoyable. I stopped trying to figure it out after a while, lived life and continued to earnestly desire something deeper than what I had been living; I also started to understand better what it was that God actually wanted of me. Slowly things changed about me. The most noticeable thing was that my priorities completely changed. Because Christ had become first in my life everything else was affected by that.
 And then, wow the most glorious thing happened. I had joy, and I had an anchor to keep me firm in that joy. It wasn't just a passing thing like every other pleasure that I had experienced, it lasted. It's not like there haven't been ups and downs, but a lasting peace is in my spirit. And I no longer feel completely lost, drifting around without a real purpose. And the longer I participate in the Church of Christ the more sure I become of His truth.

 Anyway, I'm not even close to being done with the process of sanctification, I hope and pray that the changes that have been made in me so far are miniscule compared to the plans that God has for me.

My whole purpose for writing this is this: It is so worth it. It didn't happen overnight, and it wasn't easy, but everything that God told me was true. All of His promises came through, and the peace that reigns in my heart is better than anything and everything that I had desired for and expected when I asked God to take over.
 He took a struggling girl who just wanted to be noticed, and transformed her into someone who takes the greatest joy in being His child, His child that He has called beautiful. He took an insecure "Christian kid" and turned her into a follower of Christ. He has my heart forever and for that I am eternally in the most beautiful, transforming debt. Because I did nothing to earn His love.

 Maybe this won't affect anyone, haha maybe no one will even read it all the way through, but it's something that I had to put out there. And if there is someone reading this that is going through the same type of thing maybe this can be encouraging :)

I have to say, I would never gotten this far without my family and friends, and many, many other people that encouraged me without even knowing it. I am so thankful for you all, you changed my life. 
 Most of all I am thankful to You, my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. You continue  to amaze me with your righteousness and crazy, radical Love, Mercy and gentleness towards me.

I hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas!!!
~Sami